Nov 28, 2010

Maybe, it's a viscious little word that slays me.

"I've got a thick tongue,
Brimming with the words that go unsung
Simmer then the burn for a someone,
A wrong one"

Define chemistry for me. And I don't mean the subject, I mean chemistry with people--sexual, friendship, love, connection. I'm curious to know how you see it. You can leave me anonymous comments if you're not a blogger, but I know you guys read my jumbled thoughts and often make sense of them.

After you define it, tell me why I often find it with someone I can make a list of reasons is off limits either for me or for them? I'm not looking for ordinary connections anymore. I've done that, it burns out, it feels empty. I'm looking for something I'm so caught up in that my whole body feels electric. I want to feel a desire that 40 years later can't be ignored. Isn't that everyone's plan though? I had a conversation with a dear friend yesterday in her drunken mess that we're intensely the same about this: we want so much to let someone in, but we're so busy putting walls up or protecting our borders that we're already pushing them out. we choose the people who are safe, who we know we'll never actually fall for--and ignore the chemistry.

Just some thoughts for today my little loves.


  1. Theres a lot of ways Chemistry can be defined, but in it's most simplistic form its a reaction between to substances.. in this case people. People being complex in and of themselves beyond a chemical and substantive composition emotions, souls, dreams hopes and thousands of intangibles. Yet the reaction still occurs a heat a flicker a desire for more similar to magnetism. Chemistry for me is finding someone I can braid into my life without worry and their life and hopes and dreams are complimentary to mine. Chemistry is a far different concept then attraction or lust.

  2. I think that chemistry is the force that brings you together with someone in such a way that you exist so fluidly that you never have to second guess it. Everyday isn't perfect, because that is living, but when you have that chemistry with someone, together you can work through all of life's glorious imperfections so smoothly that before it can ever break the relationship you happily and unwillingly fall back to that fluidity that only people with great chemistry possess.

    As cheesy as all the above sounds, that is exactly how I'd define it at this point in my life. I believe in this because I hope people can easily see in it in their own life already with their friends. To me, true friends have a variable of this chemistry in that they almost always make your life better without difficulty but even when the road gets rough, you work past it and are so busy making memories that you never let it destroy the great years spent becoming true friends. The challenge is figuring out how to find this chemistry with someone when in a committed relationship. When that happens, you don't have to second guess yourself and it almost feels like happily ever after. You wake up one day and 40 years have gone by with that same person waking up next to you.

    Good Luck AMG!

  3. Oh what a disaster. I came back to see if you responded and realized I went dyslexic with your initials.... sorry AGM! :)

  4. I always go for the person I know won't really hurt me, because I'll never really be there. I like to always keep them at an arms length, especially these days. It's as if the memories of the past create a force field around the happiness I'd like to have.